But how do you know when it crosses a line? When does “being visual” or “just having a high libido” turn into something more serious?

At some point, many men find themselves asking:

If that question makes you uncomfortable, you’re not alone. Many men wrestle with sexual struggles in silence, guilt, and shame. But the truth is, freedom starts with honesty.

One of the first signs of sexual addiction isn’t just the behavior—it’s the excuses we use to justify it. Here are a few we hear often in counseling:

• “I just have a higher libido than most guys.”  While libido varies from person to person, using this as a reason to watch porn daily, visit strip clubs, or engage in risky sexual behavior may be masking a deeper issue.
• “At least I’m not cheating. You should see what other guys are doing.” If you're constantly escaping into porn, chat rooms, or emotional affairs, you're still stepping outside the bounds of faithfulness—even if there’s no physical infidelity.
• “I can stop anytime I want.”  But you haven’t. And when you try, the withdrawal, irritability, or relapse cycle keeps pulling you back in.
• “It’s not hurting anyone.”  Sexual addiction often leads to broken trust, isolation, spiritual numbness, and even damage to marriages and families.

Excuses don’t lead to healing. But truth does.

Sexual addiction isn’t just about frequency—it’s about compulsivity. When sexual behaviors start to control you, interfere with your relationships, impact your spiritual life, or go against your values, it may be more than just a "struggle."

Here are a few questions to consider:

• Do I feel powerless to stop my sexual behaviors, even when I want to?
• Have I tried to quit before but found myself going back?
• Do I keep secrets from my spouse, friends, or church community?
• Have my sexual habits escalated over time (more graphic content, riskier behavior)?
• Do I use sex or porn to cope with stress, boredom, or emotional pain?

If you answered yes to several of these, it’s time to take a deeper look.

Developed by Dr. Patrick Carnes, a pioneer in the field of sexual addiction recovery, the Sexual Addiction Screening Test (SAST) is a confidential, validated tool used by professionals around the world. It helps you evaluate whether your behaviors align with patterns of sexual addiction.

You can take the test online here: https://psychology-tools.com/test/sast

It only takes a few minutes, and it could be the first real step toward healing.

Sexual addiction thrives in secrecy. But healing begins in community.

At Lighthouse Counseling, we provide confidential, grace-filled counseling for men struggling with compulsive sexual behaviors. Whether you're dealing with porn addiction, infidelity, or other sexual strongholds, we’re here to walk with you.

We also encourage finding a support group, such as:

      ● Pure Desire (puredesire.org)

      ● Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA)

      ● Celebrate Recovery

These communities offer encouragement, accountability, and the powerful reminder that you are not the only one fighting this battle—and you don’t have to fight it alone.

If you’re wondering whether your struggle with sex has become an addiction, don’t ignore that inner nudge. Take the SAST. Pray. Reach out.

There is no shame in needing help. But there is freedom in seeking it.

Let us walk with you toward healing, redemption, and restored integrity. Contact us today to schedule a confidential session.